Deadpool VS. The SCP Universe - 14- Lady D - Page 2 (2024)

 
Ellie looks out. "LA?! You let a psycho copy of my father get into a highly populated city?!!"
 
Hains groans. "We really didn't have a choice.."
 
Wade slowly gets up from the pilot seat and steps towards the door. "You keep saying that as if it is a valid excuse. If you know half the sh*t I have done, you would have thrown her into a vat of acid right next to 682." He opens the door to the helicopter and looks back. "I think you want to see how bad things will get! I think you want a show! Well, all you are going to see is a mentally broken woman on her ass!! Land your own damn chopper!!" He then jumps out.
 
Ellie leaps into the pilot seat and takes control of the helicopter. "Classic dad!"
 
"Is he going to do something stupid?!" Hains asks concerned.
 
Ellie shrugs. "It greatly depends on how Iris acts. If she gives him trouble, I have no doubt he will mess her up."
 
"What about the civilians?!" Hains exclaims.
 
Ellie looks at him. "You know.. My dad is right when he said you were making poor excuses for not being able to contain her. Hell! A high-powered shock collar would have worked! But you barely tried. The minute she showed any kind of personality change, she should have been thrown into extra secure containment." Ellie looks forward again. "If any civilians get hurt, that is on you and the Foundation."
 
As the helicopter flies on, towards the airport, Wade falls gracefully to the road below. He closes his eyes as the road draws closer, and he hits the pavement. Several vehicles swerve to a stop to avoid the body as people look on in terror and surprise.
 
An officer rushes to the remains. "What the hell happened here?!" The officer shouts at one of the nearest drivers.
 
"This guy just fell out of the sky!" The man shouts back, from his open car door.
 
The officer looks up, just as Wade begins to move again.
 
"Urge.. Thank goodness Shiklah hyped my healing factor.." He says as he slowly gets to his feet.
 
"Whoa! What the f*ck?!" The officer exclaims, stepping back and placing a hand on his gun.
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Wade turns to him. "Are you Sara Connor?!" He asks in a terminator impassionate voice.
 
"No.. My name is..."
 
Wade walks up closes, grabs the officer's gun and two mags, and pushes the officer down. "I don't care what your name is. Just stay out of my way." He then turns and begins walking down the street past a crowd of speechless people.
 
The officer is just as shocked but starts to his feet to give chase. Before he can get a few steps, an MTF agent, in full turn-out gear, grabs his shoulder.
 
"I wouldn't do that, friend. We will take it from here. You get back behind the caution tape." The MTF agent says, pointing to a black armored truck.
 
Meanwhile, Wade continues towards the beach. "If I was trapped in a woman's body, I would either steal diamonds or sunbathe on the beach. Since it is LA, I am skipping to the beach."
 
Before Wade can get too far, a team of MTF agents catch up to him.
 
"I don't remember inviting you co*ck jugglers to the party!!" Wade growls.
 
The closet MTF agent turns to him, as they walk. "First off, that is sexist! Secondly, you do your job, we will do ours. And third, if you don't like it, go home!" The female agent snaps back.
 
Wade chuckles. "That is the best come back I have got yet! What is your name?"
 
"That is need to know information, and you don't need to know.. sir." The agent replies before proceeding ahead of him.
 
Wade eyes her for a moment, and then turns to the next agent. "Can you confirm the target's location?"
 
"Southwest. She appears to be relaxing on the beach." The agent replies.
 
"Bingo! Exactly what I would have done!" Wade exclaims as he continues on.
 
Once at the beach, Wade tells the MTF unit to stand by. He walks up to Iris, who is still wearing the Deadpool mask but is wearing a bikini. He looms over her, casting his shadow over her.
 
Iris looks up with a groan. "Dude! What is your damage?! Move or I'll tear your dick off!"
 
Wade glares down at her. "Where is my stuff, Iris?" He growls.
 
Iris perks up quickly. "Are.. you Wade?!"
 
Wade nods. "I want my swords and guns.. now."
 
Iris lays back. "Though sh*t! I sold them."
 
Wade reachs down quickly and pulls her out of the chair by the mask. "If you did, then you are going to get them back!!"
 
Iris chuckles. "Aww! Does the big man miss his toys?!"
 
Wade continues to argue with Iris as a speed boat slowly turns and heads straight towards them.
 
"Wade?!" One of the agents shouts.
 
"Not now!!" Wade shouts back.
 
The boat speed closer.
 
"WADE LOOK OUT!!" The agent shouts again, louder than before.
 
Wade turns just in time to see the boat leap onto the shore. He pulls Iris down with him as the boat flies over them.
 
Wade then feels something hard buried in the sand and pulls out one of his swords. He turns to Iris. "You lying bitch!"
 
Iris reaches into the sand and pulls out the other sword. "We can deal with that later. The Chaos Insurgency is here!"
 
They both leap to their feet just in time to see a man, dressed in a red robe, standing between them and the boat.
 
"Mister Wilson and Miss Thompson I assume?" The man asks.
 
"Yeah, and what is it to you, freak-a-zoid?!" Iris snaps back.
 
The man slightly bows. "I have come to impart a gift to you, in the form of an invitation. Join us or die."
 
Wade points his sword at the man. "Counteroffer. Leave or be castrated. Final offer."
 
"Nice one!" Iris chuckles.
 
The man stands straight, with a smile. "What a pity." The man then turns away, disappearing into thin air.
 
Wade lowers his sword. "That was too easy.."
 
Suddenly, the boat erupts into flames and a large humanoid figure emerges.
 
 
           
 
 
"WADE!!!!" The flame-covered figure shouts angrily.
 
"Is this a friend of yours?" Iris asks, slowly backing away.
 
Wade co*cks his head to the side. "No.. I don't know this fire crotch."
 
Iris continues to back away. "Haha! So funny! Maybe we should run?!!"
 
The burning man advances slowly as the MTF agents open fire. The man seems unaffected by the well-placed shots. "WADE!!" He shouts again. "YOU WILL BURN!!"
 
Wade turns and runs for the water. "NOT IF YOU CAN'T CATCH ME!!!" He shouts back.
 
Iris watches at the flaming man does not hesitate, charging towards Wade at full speed. "LOOK OUT!!!" She shouts.